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Computer related sexual jokes

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How did the programmer die in the shower? He read the shampoo bottle instructions: How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? There are only 10 kinds of Computer related sexual jokes in this world: A programmer walks to the butcher shop and buys a kilo of meat.

An hour later he comes back upset that the butcher shortchanged him by 24 grams. A man is smoking a cigarette and blowing smoke rings into the air. Smoking is hazardous to your health! A programmer is walking along a beach and finds a lamp. He rubs the lamp, and a genie appears.

I can grant you any wish, but only one wish. Those people have been fighting for millennia. I can do just about anything, but this is likely beyond my limits. Please make all my users satisfied with my software and let them ask for sensible changes. Have you heard about the new Cray super computer? Two strings walk into a bar and sit down. The three most dangerous things in the "Computer related sexual jokes" are a programmer with a soldering iron, a hardware engineer with a software patch, and a user with an idea.

One hundred little bugs in the code One hundred little bugs. Fix a bug, link the fix in, One hundred little bugs in the code. A computer science student is studying under a tree and another pulls up on a flashy new bike. Obsolete Soon, Too PnP: American Association Against Acronym Abuse. God as a Programmer. Comedy Code is syntactically correct programming code written just for fun.

A programmer finds himself in front of a committee that decides whether he should go to Heaven or Hell. The committee tells the programmer he has a say in the matter and asks him if he wants to see either Heaven or Hell before stating his preference.

Instantly the programmer finds himself in red-hot lava with demons tearing at his flesh. Jesus and Satan have an argument as to who is the better programmer. This goes on for a few hours until they come to an agreement to hold a contest with God as the judge. They set themselves before their computers and begin. They type furiously, lines of code streaming up the screen, for several hours straight.

Seconds before the end of the competition, a bolt of lightning strikes, taking out the electricity. Moments later, the power is restored, and God announces that the contest is over.

He asks Satan to show his work. I lost it all when the power went out. Jesus presses a key, and the screen comes to life in vivid display, the voices of an angelic choir pour forth from the speakers. How did he do it? Whutcha git from trying to tote too much farwood. That thar thing whut splits the farwood.

Whut them dang flys do. Munchies fer the TV. Whutcha do to the hay fields. Whar the kitty sleeps. Whar you hang the dang truck keys. Them dang plastic forks and knifes.

Whut eats the grain in the barn. Holds up the barn roof. Whut you hear when you cock your gun. His last girlfriend always Computer related sexual jokes about his lack of comments. This resulted in a Syntax Error. He attempted to install a backdoor worm but her response was While his data uploaded into her input device, she considered terminating the process. But instead she initiated a Do While loop where she recalled a previous boyfriend with a larger pointer.

Hack deep into my system! E-mail Permalink Kommentare 0 Trackback […].

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