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Get over my fear of hookup

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July 30th, by Nick Notas 8 Comments. One night, I was out with a friend who struggled with expressing his sexual side. The guy knew how to hold conversation but any kind of flirting, touching, or leading was impossible to comprehend.

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I realized the only way I was going to convince him was through systematic desensitization: You start with your most attainable goals and progressively increase the challenge. Each success you experience strips away your anxieties and proves to your mind that improvement is possible. To begin, you must first admit your insecurities and recognize your defense mechanisms. Being vulnerable is the only way you will truly change. Right now you have all sorts of bullshit in your head that talks you out of being sexual.

Do you really have any idea if she wants to be hit on or not? Do you really not give a shit about meeting and having sex with a great girl? You watch porn and think about sex regularly; those desires are most definitely a part of you. I used to be one of those guys that thought women Get over my fear of hookup offended by sexuality. I swore that talking about sex early on in conversation was a turn-off.

Become consciously Get over my fear of hookup of the defense mechanisms you use. The most effective way to do this is by journaling — writing stuff down helps you be completely honest and dig into the depths of yourself. Write about your defense mechanisms and when you use them. Write down your entire sexual past in detail. List your insecurities, failures, successes, and exactly how they make you feel.

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Right now you are way below the line of where you should be sexually forward. You have to go overboard and past that line so you can find the accurate middle-ground of where you should end up.

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